Marriage Equality: Not an Issue for the Under-30 Generation
When it comes to gay marriage, the question isn't 'Why?' but 'Why Not'
By Jamie Bogert, NJ Spotlight
When Kim Kardashian pulled the plug on her marriage 72 days after saying "I do" on her reality TV show, there was plenty of head shaking, but nobody claimed it to be an abomination of the traditions and values of marriage.
Yet when a gay couple commits to spending their lives together and do so free of any celebrity-level scandals, suddenly there are attacks from left and right (mostly right). And the two words that Kim and others toss around like 24-carat engagement rings become the two words gay couples can't seem to say proudly in the state of New Jersey -- for now.
As a student at Emerson College, one of the top LGBT-friendly schools in the country, and having grown up in north Jersey, where acceptance of the gay community seemed almost second nature, it's clear that the higher approval ratings of marriage equality stem from the younger generation and are continuing to climb.
A Rutgers-Eagleton poll conducted this past summer found that 70 percent of people under the age of 30 support gay marriage. With a small twist of terminology, 75 percent support the idea of marriage equality.
As marriage equality becomes a major priority in the legislative session starting on Tuesday, Assemblyman Reed Gusciora (D-Mercer) expressed his beliefs on the subject. Gusciora teaches at The College of New Jersey and in his classes hears the opinions many young adults have about the issue.
"I see students in my American Government class who don't ask 'Why,' but say 'Why Not,'" he said. "It is the next generation who see no problem in recognizing that marriage is an institution that should be afforded all persons who remain committed to a partnership, whether they are gay or straight."
This idea resonates with the younger crowd in that many of us could care less whether Mr. Brown down the street gets hitched to Mr. Smith in the town over. Today, LGBT awareness has become more prominent, through the Internet, TV, and countless other ways we stay connected. Homosexuals are no longer hiding out, and it seems that the under-30-year-olds have accepted it and moved on.
Chairman and chief executive officer of Garden State Equality, Steven Goldstein, spoke about how many younger voters don't understand how gay marriage affects anyone else. That's where the problem lies. It affects nobody else, but is life changing for the ones trying to legitimize their relationship.
"Young people don't get what the fuss is about, it's a head scratcher for them," Goldstein said.
If we were to wait another ten years, there would be little opposition to the matter, and these marriage equality bills would prove to be a no brainer as the "who cares" generation moves its way up. But waiting for this to happen is not on the agenda.
Senate President Steve Sweeney (D-Gloucester) admitted to making the mistake of abstaining on marriage equality three years ago, but after seeing the issue as a matter of civil rights and nothing else, he has brought his opinions in line with Goldstein's.
"It took a couple of years," Goldstein said. "But Sweeney and I are finally playing on the same team"
Whichever team we decide to play on, young folks are less concerned with who loves whom and are ready to move past this debate and on to more compelling issues. Student debt anyone?
Read the related article "Democrats Line Up the Votes to Pass Gay Marriage Bill" at NJ Spotlight.com
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6:13 pm on Thursday, January 12, 2012
"Heathenism of civilization has destroyed all that is nature." John Muir
FL1985
6:42 pm on Thursday, January 12, 2012
@ Adolpho; Try the real quote: "The gross heathenism of civilization has generally destroyed nature, and poetry, and all that is spiritual. ~ John Muir. And he wrote it in a letter to J.B. McChesney, 19 September 1871 and it was not even remotely about homosexuality. Try not to twist other's words to further your own private agenda.
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7:16 pm on Thursday, January 12, 2012
FULL version or abreviated, the message is the same... Nowhere in my post did i attribute it to sexuality. Exactly what private agenda do you refer to?
FL1985
7:21 pm on Thursday, January 12, 2012
No, when you use quotes, it's a quote. Other than that, it's called paraphrasing. Regarding it's attribution; the article you commented on is about same sex marriage. Did you mistake that subject for another?
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7:59 pm on Thursday, January 12, 2012
The words are self explanitory ...you cannot detract from the fact that society's acceptance of behaviors that have diminished what is nature or spiritual , clearly can be applied...whether YOU like it or not.
FL1985
10:49 pm on Thursday, January 12, 2012
Reminds me of another Adolph(o) from history. Your self-same arguments were made in Germany circa 1930. I am sure your are quite certain of what is sociologically 'acceptable' and of course your definition of 'nature' and 'spiritual' are not-withstanding.
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12:19 am on Friday, January 13, 2012
That's right! Instead of putting facts on the board use insults and fear to reject any thoughts contrary to yours! Thats like the Socialist Party of 1936 . No mirrors in that house of the 80's huh?
FL1985
12:50 am on Friday, January 13, 2012
What facts would you like pal? You have stated your closed minded point of view. You believe that same sex marriage is akin to heathenism and against nature and to support it contributes to the decay of civilization. I mean you pretty much spelled it out for us. As for any fear that is contradictory to mine, not at all. But you provide no original thought of your own. You mangled and twisted a man's quote which had no mention even being remotely tied to the article's subject. Muir was a naturalist and author in the 1800s with no thoughts ever applied to the subject at hand. But you figured that you'd misuse his words to suit what? Your thought? Could be, but you have failed to write any of the down. Rather than rely on some regurgitated 3rd person forced fit quote; try putting your own thoughts down. You say you have a thought contradictory to mine. I have not heard any original thought at all. So please, do tell us Mr. Mostaccioli, what exactly are your views?
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7:33 am on Friday, January 13, 2012
You have obviously decided what YOU want my views to be and you still have not put any FACT on the board! JUST your opinion, which you are entitled to, and I will not attack. Since you spent some time with your encyclopedia collection researching Mr Muir try taking the time learning about the. link betwren deteriorated morals and failure of societies.
Bill
11:18 am on Friday, January 13, 2012
"Deteriorated morals"? Which society exhibits a higher moral standard, one that allows same-sex couples to marry or one which embraces the institution of slavery?
FL1985
10:27 am on Friday, January 13, 2012
The fact is that being that you used the term encyclopedia shows your are in fact, of an older dying out generation that is going the way of the dinosaur and dodo. Good riddance to you and you line of thinking. I am still not certain what facts you are looking for. You have offered none either, just your simplistic world view and closed mindedness. This my friend is not my opinion, it the fact of what you have stated. You make the comparison of same-sex marriage equating a deterioration of morals thus a failing society. "a is b therefore c." But if you are familiar with Aristotelian logic, you also know that syllogistically, it fails. It is YOUR opinion that the same-sex marriage is a negative socials moral that is contributes to a deteriorated society. Provide the proof if you would. You see sir, in the 1960s there were gentlemen like you, all hooting and hollering that mixed race marriages were contributing to the deterioration of society too. They were anti-miscegenationists. I am sure you are not a proponent of race mixing either and see that also as a deteriorating social more. If there is a general "antidote" to failure of a society, it would seem to be social cohesion, economic growth and adaptability. Adaptability, is the ability to cope and change with your environment. In fact, many modern social critics commonly interpret things like sedentary social behavior (like your unwillingness to change) as symptomatic of societal decay.
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1:45 pm on Friday, January 13, 2012
you sit at your computer professing peace love and adaptability while damming your elders and have taken it upon yourself to be ALL knowing regarding mt beliefs, world views and opinions. I have offered none of these and attempted to compel you to take a broader look around at other views and theories.Instead you keep listening to your Wham album while wearing the Boy George costume Mr 85 and the deleterious effects of what we allow as a Free and Open society will surely plummet our Country into ancient history as it occurred to tbe Greeks and the Romans. ....
FL1985
4:47 pm on Friday, January 13, 2012
I never claimed to know your beliefs I have only that foolish quote to go on. I have repeatedly asked you to expand on it but you do not. I can only take you at face value. As someone who has taken to moniker himself after a Nazi dictator and a pasta dish. As someone of your generation, which has been leading and subsequently brought this country to it's knees, you throw stones and flail your arms at issues like same sex marriage to use as your crutch for why the nation is failing. Sir, it's not even legal in a majority of states; yet look at the shape of our republic. This is really where your efforts are?! In gay marriage. Your hypothesis is preposterous at best and truly saddening. I do not damn my elders at all, I do what they have taught me. I question? Respect is earned not automatic. You say you have "compel(ed) [me] to take a broader look around at other views and theories..." Explain sir. How have you done this. You do nothing but stir the pot and offer nothing. Say what you are and what you believe instead of casting stones. You are the pendulum caught in one position. I know your type well. You believe that one must agree with every notion of what and who you are in order to be "with you;" if not, we are against you. Sad indeed. If you honestly believe that issues like same sex marriage are what is crumbling the nation, I pity you. I do not wish the entire generation into extinction, just the relics of a by-gone era - the dinosaurs like you.
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1:57 pm on Friday, January 13, 2012
Bill...go back to sleep
anti adolpho
2:39 pm on Friday, January 13, 2012
amen bill and fl1985
the world is gonig to be a much more beautiful place when close minded people like adolph(o) from his generation are gone.
adolpho- you are not open to other views as shown in your many many many posts. whatever the right does is good and whatever the left does is bad, even if they do the same thing.
i assume you post so much from a fake name because you dont have many friends to discuss things with in or if you left your real name people would realize the nut you really are and not read your post.
on most of my views i lean somewhat conservative, unless it incringes on americans freedom- such as being free to marry who ever you want. YOU are the reason people stereo type consevatives as misrable old men who are out of touch with the current times.
have a nice weekend sitting on patch while the rest of us are out enjoying life
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3:21 pm on Friday, January 13, 2012
@Anti..I am very much real...although you choose to cower behind a "handle" shows you have little. Conviction
I was unaware that I NEEDED your approval
I again see you preach "open mindedness" while wishing a whole generation into extinction( the very generation that foight for your right to do so)
I COULD CARE LESS IF YOU ARE CONSERVATIVE OR NOT.however i dont believe it for a minute based upon your very next sentence about marriage..then again when America crumbles because the likes of you embrace that which will erode society and establishments. then enjoy learning to speak Korean or Chinese
Bruce Knuckle
11:02 pm on Friday, January 13, 2012
I read and I laugh. The minute someone comes close to arguing this point the hussy comes out. Hey FL1985, which hand is yours in the picture? You are usually pretty mean spirited but, this topic has your dander way up. I can only believe that years of always being the bridesmaid and never the bride has you angry.
FL1985
12:12 am on Saturday, January 14, 2012
Wrong on assumption. As for mean spirited; not sure if I should take that as compliment. Dander way up, perhaps. I am married and in fact up until the early '70s in some parts of the country would have been put in jail for my marriage to my wife (born in NYC but of West Indian [Caribbean] descent)' Less than 45 years ago 17 states still enforced laws prohibiting marriage between whites and people of color. Two states of our great republic took far longer; it took South Carolina until 1998 and Alabama until 2000 to officially amend their states' constitutions to remove language prohibiting miscegenation. So yeah, I guess my dander flairs in the face of not so thinly veiled prejudice.
Bruce Knuckle
8:19 am on Saturday, January 14, 2012
I get it now. Attack everybody that disagrees, with you so you could feel better about yourself. Paying the folks back for making you feel like you did something wrong. I could tell this topic hit close to home because of your posts. However, I disagree that your situation is even remotely similiar to same sex marriages. I dont think its a thinly veiled prejudice to think same sex marriage is wrong. However, anyone that disagrees , immediately gets tagged as prejudice by someone like you trying to make the guilt of the past go away.
FL1985
10:29 am on Saturday, January 14, 2012
So you agree with me on the same sex marriage issue, but don't like how I arrived at my decision? I would have to believed in the correct side of the issue, but gotten there your way. You are too much. As for attacking everyone that disagrees with me - well, if you call everyone the one guy here... well, yeah, I guess so. As for paying any folks back that made me feel wrong, well, I am far too young for that, but thanks for the compliment. As for anyone that disagree's being prejudiced, well, yeah; pretty much. Either you are for equal protection and rights or you're not... if you are not, you are pretty much prejudging a group. Sorta the definition, no? But I do thank you for the free psychoanalysis. Perhaps we should talk about why you decided to name yourself after a figure in the Minnesota Men's Roller Derby circuit.
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8:31 am on Saturday, January 14, 2012
You obviously need to see Dr Phil 1985. Congrats on your marriage.i hope it lasts well into your Twilight years and gives you and your wife many memories. I suggest you take a step back and consider what Mr Knuckle posted last. In all seriousness I believe he is 100% correct. Your last post is very revealing.
FL1985
10:36 am on Saturday, January 14, 2012
Thanks pal, but I think for now you need to turn that microscope on yourself a bit and really take a good look at your own private belief system. To read what you write on here, (not just this thread) you seem to want to find every bit of what may be wrong with society and use it to drive wedges between people and force society apart. That is what I find most saddening, Try, for your own sake (and society's too), to find a reason, any reason, to bring people together.
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11:43 am on Saturday, January 14, 2012
I do not have a microscope on you. Remember it was your outbursts and rantings . I am not a missionary and as such i am entitled to my oponion..i do not "try" to drive wedges anywhere. I merely point out issues that some just may feel uncomfortable about..I am secure enuff to know not everyone will like me
FL1985
11:52 am on Saturday, January 14, 2012
Excellent then. I agree to disagree. I wonder though, being as such you disagree with what we "allow as a free and open society;" what is your alternative?
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12:53 pm on Saturday, January 14, 2012
I accept it and move on.